So

So trying to squeeze in a shower before your tempermental newborn wakes up is kind of like when you were a kid and swore up and down that jumping in the pool was the same as taking a shower...it counts as getting clean as long as you get wet right? Lol.

The Meltdown...

I must admit that lack of sleep caused me to lose my calm, cool composure and allowed the meltdown which I had been holding at bay for a few weeks to finally break through. In the midst of my childlike fit and sobbing {complete with my head hiding below my pillow in shame} I was reminded of how extremely blessed I am. Here in this moment of me completely losing it, my loving husband said these words that I so desperately needed to hear:

You are an amazing mother,

An amazing wife.

You're doing a great job

and its alright to breakdown every now and again.

I am here

and I Love you.

He then began to pray for me and thank God that I chose to love him.

I thought: SERIOUSLY!? I am laying here, completely losing it...sobbing with my head under a pillow {like a 15 year old girl who just got dumped} all because I am tired and would like to have a "day off" and instead of telling me to get a grip and stop acting like a baby {which I fully deserved. Trust me, if you had seen me, you would have agreed.} he showers me with the love that my heart was screaming for! How did he know that I so desperately needed that???

In that moment, I did not deserve for him to treat me with such grace, but I am so thankful that he did. It was such a reminder of God's grace toward us and I am so incredibly thankful for my husband who strives to love me the way God calls us to love each other. I just pray that the next time he has his own little meltdown I can offer him the same grace he gives to me.

Thank you Lord for my wonderful husband, let me never take him for granted.

WHY???

why do babies never sleep when its most convenient?!

but I guess sleep deprivation isn't so terrible when this is the little face staring back at you!

Love IT!

Love HER!

Love LIFE!

My Unplanned Blessing

I am the proud mother of a 5 week old baby girl. My husband and I had hoped to wait to have children until we were a little older and more established, but sometimes God has different plans! In the midst of all the late nights, vomitting, and numerous diaper changes I have found a joy deeper than anything this world can offer.

Today, amongst many other things, I am so thankful that:

1. I have a beautiful and healthy family who continually supports me no matter what!

2. Vomit and poop come out of cute outfits with a little help from my Oxiclean!

3. Grandparents' arms are always open when I need a free minute!